There comes a moment for so many women when they take a look at the life they’re living and utter the words, ‘is this really it’?
Their life doesn’t match the dreams and expectations that they held as a young and optimistic girl and they wonder how on earth they got here. They used to be so happy and yet now it feels like they’re constantly chasing happiness and it always seems to outrun them.
For some it feels like right now life has beaten them. They’ve lost who they are, they can’t remember the last time they belly laughed until they cried, and they have absolutely no idea where they’re headed. Where there was once joy, passion and enthusiasm for life, there is now only exhaustion, overwhelm and the dread of all the demands that they know will be placed on them.
There’s this nagging feeling within them that they were meant for more, that they should be doing more; but it’s like having an annoying itch you can’t quite reach. Part of them has given up on ever having what they want; the job, the career, true love, adventure, excitement, or a toned and healthy body. It feels too far out of reach and they just don’t know if they have the strength to make it happen any more. They are physically and emotionally exhausted, and at times disconnected to how they truly feel.
This empty feeling is simply a survival mechanism. They’re blocking their emotions, because to be really honest with themselves is quite frankly, scary as hell. They’re terrified by what might come up and, in those moments, choosing emptiness is the safer and easier option.
We’ve all done this, pretended that we’re okay, we’re coping and we’re happy. The reality is, we’re just not sure we can cope with the intensity of our emotions; we’re scared by what could emerge and the impact this could have. Something, or someone from our past has made us believe that expressing and feeling strong emotions was not okay and acceptable, probably as it made them uncomfortable. So now it doesn’t feel safe for us, or even allowed.
It doesn’t matter what your current situation is; married, single, divorced, a house full of kids, an empty nest, or someone who never had children, these feeling can sneak up on us all, because life happens and things change, we change. The unexpected can be thrown at us and in those moments, we have a choice as to whether we sink or swim. Just so you know, sometimes it can take a whole lot of sinking, flapping our arms about like a crazy person and choking on water, before we finally decide that enough is enough.
None of us knows what the future holds and I have seen too many people get to retirement, only to experience ill health and be unable to do all the things they dreamed of. This is such a waste of life and I decided this was not going to be me. I was committed to choosing happiness and I wanted to enjoy life now. Changing the course of your life, changing how you feel and being happy again is completely possible. I know because I did this while dealing with a massive amount of change. There were challenges in my life, which at times tested my sanity to the very core.
I was determined to release all that negative talk inside my head, telling me what I could and could not do. Boy she was mean sometimes and I was fed up with believing her. Like most people I really was my own worst critic, who needs enemies when you can just tell yourself how you’re constantly failing, lacking and clearly aren’t enough. I had spent years feeling like I wasn’t enough because of other people’s expectations of me and putting their needs first. I was tired, I was lost, and I was ready to come home to myself. I was done with over giving, over working and trying to be accepted by people who quite frankly didn’t have my best interests at heart.
Know this, you matter and what you want and need matters. It’s time to connect with your inner truth, it’s time to find your voice and share who you really are. No doubt there will be plenty of old stories and beliefs that try and convince you that you aren’t worth listening too and have nothing interesting to say, but you have to decide not to listen. Decide that you deserve to have a joyful and abundant life and that you deserve to be happy now.
It’s time to stop using excuses about when the kids grow up, when your parents don’t need you, when you lose weight, or when your partner is more established and happier in their work. There will never be the perfect time and you’ll always find excuses if you’re not committed. Now is your time and when you truly believe this, passion, energy, abundance and opportunities will flow to you in ways you can’t even imagine. The blocks will lift, your motivation and enthusiasm will return, and the world will become exciting again.
From one overworked, overwhelmed and time poor lady to another, just know, you can change your life and you can be happy again and if you’re ready, I’m going to show you how. Over the last ten years, I have worked with hundreds of people, in thousands of sessions and as you can imagine, themes and patterns emerge. I know that change is possible, because I have walked this path and emerged the other side with a life, I am incredibly grateful for. I have also supported hundreds of other women in walking their own unique and individual path too.
So, are you ready to commit to yourself and choose happiness? Are you willing to commit to yourself, your dreams and your life? It doesn’t matter what starts the fire in your belly, only that it’s there and that you’re ready to fan the flames. If all of this has resonated for you, then check out my book ‘I Choose To Be Happy’ on Amazon. It’s now available electronically and as a paperback.
Until next time!
Helping sensitive souls to embody self-care, self-acceptance and self-belief
The following are some of the most common questions I get asked about being happy. If you have a question of your own, you’re welcome to drop me an email.