When we feel responsible for others, we can often feel like we’re carrying the weight of the world on our shoulders! We take on their emotions, their energy and sometimes even their physical pain, just to make life a little easier for them – trouble is, it doesn’t make it easier for us!
It’s why so many people and especially those who are sensitive, healers or lightworkers end up exhausted and burnt out. They are just so tired from feeling like they have to fix, save or rescue other people. We have this intense desire to rush in and save the day, even to our own detriment. We put other peoples happiness, wants and needs before our own. This is fine to do every now and again, because of course our friends and family are going to need us at some points in life… but the danger comes when we make this a habit and we can’t break free from it.
Often this habit or belief, comes from a key decision we made in our early childhood. We decided that it was our role or duty to help others. Maybe you saw people struggle and when you intervened it made life easier, or perhaps you were directly told that you were responsible.
I understand this more than most, because my desire to make people feel better was so strong and it was easy for me, but in doing this I wasn’t truly helping them, or myself. I ended up unwell, exhausted and resentful. Even questioning if I really wanted to be a healer anymore… I felt that people just took from me and I had reached a point where I had nothing left to give. I do not want that for you.
Here are three simple reasons why we need to break this habit:
- When we believe we have to fix, save and rescue others we are doubting their own abilities and strength. In the nicest possible way, we are saying I don’t trust you to make good choices and to fix this on your own. We are literally taking their power and their learning away. With the space to rise to the occasion, they might just surprise you.
- By taking on the responsibility of their unhappiness, pain and struggles, we can often enable the very behaviour that brought them to that point. Sometimes tough love is needed. Those around you and those you work with, need to accept self responsibility for their life and choices.
- If you continue to carry this heavy burden, you will end up exhausted, ill and resentful. Know that you can still help people and make a difference, without energetically carrying their ‘stuff’.
I know it can at times feel very harsh, especially when you can feel them wanting to dump their ‘stuff’ all over you – but this is when you need to remain strong and choose love. Trust them, see their strength and know that you do not have to step in. If it helps, imagine a beautiful bubble all around you that doesn’t let in negativity, or anything that doesn’t belong to you.
Watch this EFT video on feeling responsibility for others and see what comes up for you. As always, see what it brings up for you. It will help you to see where this impacts your life the most and with who. This may not be something that stops overnight, but bringing awareness to your habit is the first step. After watching the video, reflect on these questions:
- Why do I feel so responsible for others?
- When did this first start?
- What do I fear would happen if I didn’t rush in and fix, save or rescue them?
- Am I doubting their own ability, competence and emotional strength?
- Are there certain people I always do this with?
- How would it feel to simply let go of this responsibility and focus on me and my life?
- What would you be focusing your time and energy on instead?
If you are ready to explore this a little deeper, then I would love to work with you. I don’t want you to hold yourself back from sharing your gifts, simply because you take on too much. This is a habit that can be changed and we can bring the passion and joy back into your work and life. Together we can use my special blend of EFT and Energy Work to overcome this exhausting and destructive habit – just click here for more information.
Until next time!
EFT Practitioner & Energy Worker
Helping the empowered woman who is ready to banish negativity, self-doubt & self-sabotage forever – time to believe in yourself and take action!