Are you happy in your relationship?
It’s a simple question, but it’s always interesting to me how people often pause to think.
Because, if you’re happy, you know you are. You love the life you’ve created together, you love spending time together, and while there are the usual ups and downs of being in a relationship, you know that what you have is healthy, fulfilling and there’s no where else you would want to be!
If you’re not happy, then this question can then make you wonder why your answer was no, why you’re unsure, or why you took so long to reply. For some people the reason behind their unhappiness is clear, but for others it’s more difficult to define or explain; all you know, is that you’re not happy.
Let’s look at this more deeply, because all too often people pleasing women can overlook things in their relationships that others would consider toxic, unhealthy or even abuse. Our inner child and all her wounds are running the show. We’re so terrified of abandonment and rejection and we’re desperate to be liked, to feel enough, to feel safe and to avoid conflict, and this means we settle for partners that we really shouldn’t.
Take a look at some of the things that could be happening in your relationship:
There is a lack of emotional intimacy and no space for your deeper emotions or feelings. Either you’re not heard, you’re minimised, you’re ignored, or told you’re too sensitive.
There is a lack of trust in the relationship and you have repeatedly been lied to, betrayed, cheated on and let down. You don’t feel safe with your partner any more.
Everything is about them. What they want, need and believe and you’re made to feel wrong if you disagree or try and ask for your needs to be met.
You constantly feel drained; having to think about them, their reactions, their moods, emotions and negativity. Your nervous system is in tatters and it’s impacting your physical health too.
You don’t know who you are any more; what you like, what you enjoy, what you believe in, or even what you might like to do in the future.
Your confidence is in pieces. You doubt yourself, your intuition, your abilities, your sparkle, shine and mojo is no where to be seen and you’re a shadow of your former self.
You just feel lonely even when they are right there with you.
If you experience any of these in your relationship, of course, you’re not happy; how could you be! The question is, what do you want to do about it?
Decide that now is the time to take action and to gain more understanding and insight into your unhappiness and your relationship. Whether you prefer online sessions, or you enjoy meeting face to face, I can help.
